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I'll Never Understand

Writer: ShelleyShelley

I started making a list of things I will never understand so I won't dwell on them or in case I get satisfactory information someday to understand better. Follow that? Hang in there. I will list some of them here so you get the idea. Feel free to weigh in and perhaps we can solve these things together.


What was the whole toilet paper shortage of 2020 about? How does pandemic equate to toilet paper hoarding? I buy one package of toilet paper from Costco about once a year. That's how long it lasts. Why would I even think to go buy toilet paper because of a virus? It would never occur to me. Never once did I hear it caused the need to use the bathroom more. Huh.


How is it possible to leave a hair or a strip of hair EVERY time I shave my legs? I feel like I go over each leg several times and yet later, I notice what I missed and am baffled. I'll just stare at the place and shake my head. It's never the same place. At least I don't think so.


Why do my dogs and cats go into my walk in shower and lick up the water after I get out? They have plenty of water in their water bowls and yet they do it every time. Has anyone else noticed this with their pets and showers? I think someone should do a study....


Speaking of showers, I'm pretty sure people with eyeglasses take them off before they get in. I know I do. And if I get to take a shower in someone else's house when I visit them, I almost always can't read the shampoo or conditioner bottles to see what to use. The words are tiny and I have grabbed the wrong one first more often than not. One time I used flea and tick shampoo not knowing my hosts bathed their dogs in the shower. How hard would it be to make the first letter of shampoo and conditioner BIG so it's obvious?


Why do my dogs always look embarrassed when they poop? Why do I interpret it as embarrassment? Maybe it's relief or pain. I will never know.


Now you get the gist of how my brain is always working on what I like to think of as interesting stuff. I can go on and on.


Maybe I should write a book. Oh wait, I did and another one is coming out in about September. Stay tuned!

 
 
 

3 Comments


donnydownhill
donnydownhill
Jun 13, 2021

Okay Miss Shelley... I'll make this as brief as possible seeing how you have a habit of finding Briefs along your paths...

1) "What was the whole toilet paper shortage of 2020 about? How does pandemic equate to toilet paper hoarding?"

My reply - Some People are Full of $hit! Those who might seek a financial opportunity to prosper by Hoarding Backdoor Cleansing Materials. Best part about hoarding TP is the stores refused to accept returns. Wipe on Hoarder!

2) "How is it possible to leave a hair or a strip of hair EVERY time I shave. I notice what I missed and am baffled."

My reply - Give yourself some credit. Having never shaved my legs (but I'm not…


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tom
Jun 07, 2021

You left a strip of hair because you forgot your razor at my house. I'll give it back to you when you visit during fall transplanting season!!! :D

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Shelley
Shelley
Jun 08, 2021
Replying to

I knew there was a reason I left it. I bet you never have this problem. And as Arnold said, 'I'll be back!' Wait, what are we transplanting?

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