I just turned 68. As with every year in my 60's, I try to come up with a saying to celebrate each year. So far, my favorite was 'I'm 61 and so much fun.' I struggled a bit until I got to 68 which is 'I'm 68 and life is great!' which beats the heck out of 'I'm 65 and still alive.' or 'I'm 64 and I want more.' I won't bore you with the others. You are welcome.
This past year, and it continues to this very day, is how I'm realizing my behavior is leaning more and more to adulting. Technically, I've been an adult for a long time but I never really felt it before and as I accomplish anything these days, I hear the word adulting in my brain more times than I would like.
For example, in the last year I've had my gallbladder out and faced the worst pain since childbirth. That wasn't fun. And I've been to more funerals than weddings. Should I happen upon obituaries, I find more people dying who are close to me in age. Sobering. Adulting to the max.
While I'm not throwing in the towel yet, I have discovered I am spending more time giving myself pep talks on finding the good in every day than I ever have. Maybe it's the times we are in or just coming to terms with aging and actually feeling some kind of pain in my body at all times. Most of the time I just ignore it. Just like I've chosen to not watch or read the news. Bliss is under-rated, and I look for those moments to breathe in the good in every dang day.
It hit me this spring that I no longer feel as comfortable pulling my camping trailer as I once did and when I did go out, it didn't seem to be as fun as it once was. I never thought I'd say that. The trailer gave me the freedom to explore the world on my terms and I took advantage of it anytime I felt I could get away. It was the essence of me. What happened?
The world somehow shifted. The responsibilities of life caught up to me and I decided to make some big changes. I'm selling both my Rpods and a whole lot of other things I've got around my house and garage. Purging and adjusting to what I really want to take advantage of in the future. I bought a camper van and I'm going to go play.
Purging is not as simple as it sounds. It's a lot of work to get rid of stuff and I have to lower my expectations on how quickly I can get it done. It actually takes up more space in my brain than in the physical reality of actually doing it. That has to stop. Look at me pep talking away!
Balance is another thing that has gotten away from me. My responsibility to my 94 year old Little Mother has made me afraid to go anywhere for more than a week. The big house I live in requires too much physical work and something is always breaking down. I can't sit down without feeling I should jump up and work on something around here. I have excuses out the ying yang and that's on me. I either need to accept this reality for the time being, make some kind of peace with it, or continue to feel inept. This is where baby steps come in. Oh yeah, and forgiveness.
Adulting is hard but every time I actually accomplish things, I feel 68 and really
great!!!
It's time to get off my fanny and get something else done. Byeeeee.
As I drive our RV down 101 from Oregon right now, I have given lots of thought to how these days will definitely have an expiration limit. It didn’t help that our slide-through compartment door was flapping in the breeze as we sailed down the road. Next the slide and the awning will still be out…😱. We focus a lot on family and friends when we travel…More than sight seeing actually, although that is always awesome. I have been taking some severe medicine and it cramps my happy style and energy a bit for sure, but don’t want to complain too much. Been downsizing each move and getting rid of stuff and need to get rid of lots more. …