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Men's Underwear Followup

In my first book I wrote a story called Do I Want To Know? It had to do with my unfathomable ability to find men's underwear in the wild. Since that time I have received more than a few pairs of underwear in the mail, pictures other people have taken of underwear in unlikely places and even underwear swag. Yup, underwear swag. It's a thing.

I have a really good but somewhat warped sense of humor friend who took an old pair of her son's clean underwear and hung it on the 4 iron of my golf bag. It waved in the wind whenever we took a cart rather than walking. She also made me neck pillows out of boy's underwear. Swag. I never would have guessed. For some reason, I can't give them away.

My book came out in July 2018. From then through 2019 I think I only found one pair of men's underwear. I was both relieved and a wee bit sad. Even though I wasn't running across any there were others who were and they sent pictures. One of the women in the retirement community where my mom lives contacted mom about a pair laying in the entrance landscape area at the place. She wanted me to have the picture she took of it. I will cherish it always. A friend sent me a picture of a pair hanging from a road construction cone up in Canada that they saw on the way to go camping. I'm getting quite a collection.

Then along comes 2020, the year from hell for everyone. I wasn't even thinking about men's underwear which is probably why it has been a banner year for my questionable hobby. I think I set an annual record. The first pair I found after a glorious day fly fishing on the Missouri River. At the takeout we got out of the boat and our guide went to get the truck and trailer. My friend Eileen and I were just standing there waiting for him when I walked up to a nearby sign to read it. I looked down and there was a pair of whitish men's underwear. I pointed it out to Eileen. She was not as excited as I was. Imagine that.

The next sighting was at the Old Works Golf Course near Anaconda, Montana. Our fearsome foursome group had driven over to play this course because it was built on old mine tailings and designed by Jack Nicklaus. I was waiting near the bathroom between holes for my friends to finish using the facilities. Actually I wasn't really waiting, I was scouring the brush uphill from it for errant golf balls. I literally stopped in my tracks when I saw a pair of, you guessed it, men's underwear. Why would anyone throw them there when there's a perfectly fine restroom 10 feet away? Of course I had to show my friends who were immediately grossed out. Yay!

Most recently, I took my little Rpod camper down to southern Utah for the winter and got to hang out with friends and do a few hikes. One of the places we go has petrified wood so we hiked around looking for more and what did I stumble on? A pile of petrified wood next to a pair of men's boxers. This was my first boxer sighting ever. It was not petrified. Whew.

On my way north, I always stop at the same places to let the dogs out and stretch my legs. One of our favorites has some really great rock formations and I've taken a lot of pictures of the dogs posing on the highest part of some of them. It makes my little Corgi, Maizy, feel really tall. Anyway, we were there, doing our usual walk through the rocks and sage. I came around the corner of one of the bigger formations and low and behold blue Fruit of the Loom men's underwear. How could someone mess up our favorite spot? But they did and the picture here shows the spot.

So, four pair found in 2020. All were Fruit of the Loom. I swear I didn't touch any of them and I never will. Per my story in Did I Say That Out Loud?, I am still pondering many questions of which, why do I have to be the one to find them, is the one I am most interested in the answer to. Then again, do I really want to know?

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Debra White
Debra White
20 nov. 2020

This is hilarious! Love your stories.

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